You can tell a deceptive amount about a household from their frontgarden. This may sound like an obvious statement to make but its complexity struck me on a routine walk to the station.
I am very nosey, perhaps I verge on voyeuristic at points. As I walked along, I looked into garden after garden and started to make my (not nearly as superficial as you may think) judgements about the inhabitants beyond.
Firstly I want to make the distinction between intention and interpretation. Certain elements are strategically placed in a frontgarden for a specific purpose. The owners have tried to craft their initial welcome to the world, encouraging people to make certain, obviously favourable, decisions about them.
Spy the exotic flower arrangements, lovingly tended and watered. Yes, they exhibit beauty but they also make me wonder why someone would go to so much time and expense to create an oasis that serves no purpose other than to provide the proverbial passerby (me in this case) with something nice to look at. Frontgardens lack the privacy that back gardens willingly provide. You can enjoy your back yard. We do not live in Tennessee so, however attractive the idea of sitting on your porch glugging back copious amounts of bourbon all day is to you, it will never be a reality. Admit it, you would look pretty weird rolling out the sun lounger on your front porch and settling down for a satisfying spot of people watching. Although the JD may cure you of your inhibitions in a relatively short while.
So are these horticultural marvels an altruistic act whereby benevolent philanthropists bestow additional beauty to the world? No, thought not.
My theory goes right back to Elizabethan psychology which was probably informed and shaped by the good old Garden of Eden as so many things are. They used the garden as a metaphor for general wellbeing. Everything being rosy in the garden maybe a cliché but it has hidden depths. If our gardens are ordered and pleasant to look at, then we truly believe that people will assume that we actually know how to behave like sane human beings. They might even want to be our friends.
It's not just aesthetic pressures that we succumb to these days with our garden/facade: the ecofriendly culture grows with every breath. We have to have clear evidence on our front gardens that we toe the line re recycling. Whilst we want everyone to know that we are looking after our carbon footprint, this practice also illustrates how front gardens can start to communicate information about us that we would rather keep to ourselves. This is even better for my sticky beak- I get to see what papers/wine people consume. This definitely gives me a sound basis for character judgement if ever there was one.
What other nasties can the front of your house reveal? Unexplained packages on the doorstep? Moss in the crooks of your paving slabs? A defunct washing machine? Perhaps all of the above have symbolic value.
I have always had an obsession about net curtains. How can you not have them? As I walk down to the station, I can see people having dinner, watching television, picking their nose...How intrusive! It is the car crash mentality, or perhaps for me the moth going towards the light. I don't want to look but I just can't help myself. Why do people let so much of themselves be readily viewed by the outside world? I would feel as though I was on some sick, omnipresent version of Big Brother. If you don't have any form of blinds at present then invest, please, save me from myself.
Now you have finished reading, go and do what you have been thinking about for the last couple of paragraphs: have an objective perusal of your own front garden. What does it say about you? I've just looked- there is a dead frog on mine. Oh dear.
Friday 26 September 2008
Friday 5 September 2008
Health Feature for London Lite-Mon 1st Sept (They edited it slightly to make me sound as wacko as Jacko)
King of Pop meets King of Bop
As a child of the ‘80s, I salute the man who made crotch grabbing socially acceptable for the under tens. Although, in recent years, the previous accomplishment has soured somewhat, it is impossible to deny Michael Jackson's contribution to music over the last 5 decades.
He moonwalked into the world 50 years ago and his music may not have healed the world but it certainly has made it a better place. He has chosen to celebrate his half century by releasing a new collection of his best work: The King of Pop. The public voted for their all time favourite hits across the world and each country has released a unique album of 17 tracks.
How should one personally commemorate such an occasion? By attending Anthony King's dance class at Pineapple Studios in Covent Garden of course. If you are wondering who he is then you are not in the know. Anthony King is a celebrity choreographer who specialises in Jacko; he has also written a book and released a DVD- Anthony King’s Thriller Dance Workout. He has been touted in the media as ‘the next big thing’. My hopes were high; would my cellulite take a leaf out of Michael's book and beat it?
I got to the venue early to chew the aforementioned fat with Anthony before the class began. I learnt that there is a reason for his interest in MJ: His stepbrother worked for Jackson, so while we were all practising the infamous “HeeHee” manoeuvre in our bedrooms, he was watching it for real. It was clear from our initial handshake that Anthony King has the passion. He is dynamic, enthusiastic and charismatic. His favourite MJ song is Wanna be Startin’ Somethin’ and he certainly seems capable of this.
Pineapple Dance Studios fitted perfectly with the required 80s ambience. It is a rabbit warren of studios brim full with people with sinewy limbs and lots of energy. One thing to be prepared for though is the heat. It is a hot bed of creatvity and perspiration!
Warm up
We had a good turn out for a Wednesday night and you immediately felt included. Anthony made a point of talking to everyone and addressing them personally once the class got under way. We warmed up with some intense jogging on the spot. Watching my thighs jiggle in the mirror was not a high point but it got the blood flowing. Ironically enough, the overall routine was based to Beat It but Anthony said that every class is different so, if you go regularly, you will be treated to an array of hits.
Session
We carefully and slowly built up an intricate routine over the hour. Anthony took time to explain each section, modelling what he meant and then giving us the opportunity to practice before we attempted to put it to the music.This was all well and good for those with some semblance of rhythm, but I had distinct difficulties with my motor skills as the moves became progressively complex. This wasn't a problem though; Anthony gave everyone encouraging feedback. Even though I was much less coordinated than most, I still felt pretty damn good as we frenetically moved to the infectious beats. However inept you are, it is impossible not to enjoy yourself. Anthony is not afraid to be the man in the mirror either, he is an exceptionally talented dancer who is mesmerizing to watch. By the end of the class, I was sweaty and exhilarated. I had even kind of mastered the routine in my own special way.
Benefits
Anthony believes that dance allows you to gain a physical and psychological high very quickly. In his high-energy class, he is not wrong! Dance movements are multi directional and therefore good for your joints. The weight bearing and varied moves can improve bone density. Dancing is also good for balance and agility. The process releases toxins and alleviates stress. Regular participation can reduce your heart rate, lower blood pressure and improve cholesterol levels. You can't really argue with all of that, can you?
Verdict
If you are after a fun way to improve your fitness and love all things MJ then this class is perfect. It is not pretentious or intimidating; no-one wants to take anything too seriously apart from the music.
So did I fulfil my need to celebrate Jackson's 50th? Definitely. Was I any good? Hmm… When asked on his thoughts regarding the white gloved one, Bob Geldof said: "When Michael Jackson sings, it's with the voice of angels, and when his feet move you can see God dancing." I would like to say that I exhibited some vaguely similar qualities but if I did, I would be telling atrocious porky pies.
Michael Jackson Style Dance Class- Pineapple Dance Studios, Mon/Wed 6-7, Sat 3-4.
For more information on Anthony King- www.anthony-king.com
As a child of the ‘80s, I salute the man who made crotch grabbing socially acceptable for the under tens. Although, in recent years, the previous accomplishment has soured somewhat, it is impossible to deny Michael Jackson's contribution to music over the last 5 decades.
He moonwalked into the world 50 years ago and his music may not have healed the world but it certainly has made it a better place. He has chosen to celebrate his half century by releasing a new collection of his best work: The King of Pop. The public voted for their all time favourite hits across the world and each country has released a unique album of 17 tracks.
How should one personally commemorate such an occasion? By attending Anthony King's dance class at Pineapple Studios in Covent Garden of course. If you are wondering who he is then you are not in the know. Anthony King is a celebrity choreographer who specialises in Jacko; he has also written a book and released a DVD- Anthony King’s Thriller Dance Workout. He has been touted in the media as ‘the next big thing’. My hopes were high; would my cellulite take a leaf out of Michael's book and beat it?
I got to the venue early to chew the aforementioned fat with Anthony before the class began. I learnt that there is a reason for his interest in MJ: His stepbrother worked for Jackson, so while we were all practising the infamous “HeeHee” manoeuvre in our bedrooms, he was watching it for real. It was clear from our initial handshake that Anthony King has the passion. He is dynamic, enthusiastic and charismatic. His favourite MJ song is Wanna be Startin’ Somethin’ and he certainly seems capable of this.
Pineapple Dance Studios fitted perfectly with the required 80s ambience. It is a rabbit warren of studios brim full with people with sinewy limbs and lots of energy. One thing to be prepared for though is the heat. It is a hot bed of creatvity and perspiration!
Warm up
We had a good turn out for a Wednesday night and you immediately felt included. Anthony made a point of talking to everyone and addressing them personally once the class got under way. We warmed up with some intense jogging on the spot. Watching my thighs jiggle in the mirror was not a high point but it got the blood flowing. Ironically enough, the overall routine was based to Beat It but Anthony said that every class is different so, if you go regularly, you will be treated to an array of hits.
Session
We carefully and slowly built up an intricate routine over the hour. Anthony took time to explain each section, modelling what he meant and then giving us the opportunity to practice before we attempted to put it to the music.This was all well and good for those with some semblance of rhythm, but I had distinct difficulties with my motor skills as the moves became progressively complex. This wasn't a problem though; Anthony gave everyone encouraging feedback. Even though I was much less coordinated than most, I still felt pretty damn good as we frenetically moved to the infectious beats. However inept you are, it is impossible not to enjoy yourself. Anthony is not afraid to be the man in the mirror either, he is an exceptionally talented dancer who is mesmerizing to watch. By the end of the class, I was sweaty and exhilarated. I had even kind of mastered the routine in my own special way.
Benefits
Anthony believes that dance allows you to gain a physical and psychological high very quickly. In his high-energy class, he is not wrong! Dance movements are multi directional and therefore good for your joints. The weight bearing and varied moves can improve bone density. Dancing is also good for balance and agility. The process releases toxins and alleviates stress. Regular participation can reduce your heart rate, lower blood pressure and improve cholesterol levels. You can't really argue with all of that, can you?
Verdict
If you are after a fun way to improve your fitness and love all things MJ then this class is perfect. It is not pretentious or intimidating; no-one wants to take anything too seriously apart from the music.
So did I fulfil my need to celebrate Jackson's 50th? Definitely. Was I any good? Hmm… When asked on his thoughts regarding the white gloved one, Bob Geldof said: "When Michael Jackson sings, it's with the voice of angels, and when his feet move you can see God dancing." I would like to say that I exhibited some vaguely similar qualities but if I did, I would be telling atrocious porky pies.
Michael Jackson Style Dance Class- Pineapple Dance Studios, Mon/Wed 6-7, Sat 3-4.
For more information on Anthony King- www.anthony-king.com
Articles from Bexley News Work Experience
Residents fire-off Olympic criticism
04 September 2008
HOPEFUL: Gordon Lee is optimistic that the 2012 shooting events will be moved.
CAMPAIGNERS have welcomed a government decision to review the location of three Olympic sites.
Olympics Minister Tessa Jowell ordered an investigation last Thursday into the cost effectiveness and impact of three proposed venues for London 2012.
The equestrian, shooting and basketball venues in Greenwich, Woolwich and East London will be analysed by accountancy firm KPMG after communities expressed concern about the damage and expense of certain sites.
Residents have slammed the proposal to use the 185-acre royal park in Greenwich for horse riding events fearing damage to trees. And the decision to host shooting events at The Royal Artillery Barracks in Woolwich rather than Dartford has also come under fire.
Michael Goldman, of pressure group NOGOE (NO to Greenwich Olympic Equestrian Events), claims that their concerns have been overlooked by the London Organising Committee of the Olympic Games (LOCOG).
He said: "The case for the opposition is not mere nimbyism, there are real, practical objections involved that LOCOG has been very slow to react to. The cross country jumping event will cause permanent damage to the park."
Gordon Lee, manager of Dartford Clay Shooting Club, fears millions of pounds will be wasted on a temporary site at Woolwich when facilities are already in place at Dartford.
He said: "I can guarantee that the plans for Dartford would have cost at least £7 million less. The indoor shooting ranges would have been used after 2012 by the community for other indoor games like netball. The site would even have been large enough international fixtures like World Cup qualifiers."
Announcing the plans, Ms Jowell said: "When you take the costs of these venues, it seems like a lot of money to a lot of people. It's sort of testing-to-destruction to see whether that spending can be justified."
But she said that scrapping the plans for the proposed venues is "possible but unlikely".
The equestrian events for London 2012 could run into tens of millions of pounds after this year's venue in Beijing cost £52 million to build with a further £15 to £20 million to stage the events.
The building plans at Woolwich could cost up to £25 million and the structure will be taken down eight days after the event.
Despite widespread opposition in his constituency, Nick Raynsford MP is reluctant to openly criticise the use of Greenwich Park. In a letter to a national newspaper in June, he wrote: "Staging the Olympic and Paralympic equestrian events in Greenwich Park does not mean 'the destruction of a 300-year-old avenue of ancient oaks' let alone 'the loss of wonderful views over the city'." For more information on NOGOE and Greenwich Park, log on to www.nogoe12.com. For Woolwich Barracks, log on to http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/OlympicShooting/.
‘Unhappy’ residents paint a depressing picture of towns
04 September 2008
A SURVEY has revealed bleak findings - that we are some of the most depressed individuals in the country, writes Liz McMahon.
Research published by the British Household Panel Survey claims Bexley, Dartford and Gravesham, Bromley and Greenwich are among the saddest towns in the UK.
When asked a series of questions including 'Do you think of yourself as a worthless person?', many answered yes.
Bromley came in at a dismal 215, a double blow for the town after being voted London's ugliest borough in a recent poll reported in the Times.
Bexley fared best, coming in at 132, but there was sorry news for Greenwich, which came in the bottom 60 at 225 out of a total 282.
David Sleep, Chairman of the Eltham Society, was alarmed to discover Greenwich's gloomy result.
He said: "I don't know who these people asked but they should have come to me! Greenwich has so much history to offer.
"It is the centre on naval history and the British Empire. It is the gateway to other continents. People sometimes forget its significance.
"It has more open spaces than any other borough in London and an amazingly diverse community.
"It has high standards of public services and transport that will only improve with new Olympic developments."
Dartford and Gravesham hit the middle of the league at number 150.
Experts are divided on what makes people the happiest, citing solutions to a more positive outlook as a good sex life or watching television.
But scientists believe that the longer you stay in a place the happier you get. So hang in there.
Contaminated vodka could cause blindness
28 August 2008
HUNDREDS of bottles of poisoned vodka that could cause blindness have been seized by police.
Counterfeit bottles of Imperial Vodka bearing the SPAR brand name have been found to have excessive levels of methanol in them which, if consumed in large quantities, can cause blindness.
The Food Standards Agency issued a warning after 180 of the bottles were found in a Newcastle flat on August 5 and 70 were reported to be distributed elsewhere, 28 of them in London.
Now Bexley council is urging residents to be vigilant.
A Bexley Council spokesman said: "Excessive levels of methanol have been found in the counterfeit bottles, which would pose a potential health risk if consumed."
Bogus bottles have the smell of acetone, similar to nail varnish and have the code QI:1445c near the base and a smudged inkjet code reading: 102234 04/08/02.
So far, no bottles of the poisoned vodka have been found in SPAR stores.
A spokesman for SPAR said: "SPAR can confirm it has taken the appropriate steps to inform authorities at both the FSA and Trading Standards, and the counterfeit vodka has not affected legitimate supply routes to stores."
Customers should only buy SPAR labelled products from their stores and to be suspicious if they see them sold elsewhere.
This is not the first case of harmful vodka being illegally sold this year.
In February, Glen's Vodka was taken off the market in Hertfordshire and in April, HK Wines of London Road, Thornton Heath was fined £500 for selling bottles of fake vodka.
Anyone with information about the sale of counterfeit SPAR Imperial Vodka should contact the Food Safety Team on 020 8308 7634 or email food.safety@bexley.gov.uk.
04 September 2008
HOPEFUL: Gordon Lee is optimistic that the 2012 shooting events will be moved.
CAMPAIGNERS have welcomed a government decision to review the location of three Olympic sites.
Olympics Minister Tessa Jowell ordered an investigation last Thursday into the cost effectiveness and impact of three proposed venues for London 2012.
The equestrian, shooting and basketball venues in Greenwich, Woolwich and East London will be analysed by accountancy firm KPMG after communities expressed concern about the damage and expense of certain sites.
Residents have slammed the proposal to use the 185-acre royal park in Greenwich for horse riding events fearing damage to trees. And the decision to host shooting events at The Royal Artillery Barracks in Woolwich rather than Dartford has also come under fire.
Michael Goldman, of pressure group NOGOE (NO to Greenwich Olympic Equestrian Events), claims that their concerns have been overlooked by the London Organising Committee of the Olympic Games (LOCOG).
He said: "The case for the opposition is not mere nimbyism, there are real, practical objections involved that LOCOG has been very slow to react to. The cross country jumping event will cause permanent damage to the park."
Gordon Lee, manager of Dartford Clay Shooting Club, fears millions of pounds will be wasted on a temporary site at Woolwich when facilities are already in place at Dartford.
He said: "I can guarantee that the plans for Dartford would have cost at least £7 million less. The indoor shooting ranges would have been used after 2012 by the community for other indoor games like netball. The site would even have been large enough international fixtures like World Cup qualifiers."
Announcing the plans, Ms Jowell said: "When you take the costs of these venues, it seems like a lot of money to a lot of people. It's sort of testing-to-destruction to see whether that spending can be justified."
But she said that scrapping the plans for the proposed venues is "possible but unlikely".
The equestrian events for London 2012 could run into tens of millions of pounds after this year's venue in Beijing cost £52 million to build with a further £15 to £20 million to stage the events.
The building plans at Woolwich could cost up to £25 million and the structure will be taken down eight days after the event.
Despite widespread opposition in his constituency, Nick Raynsford MP is reluctant to openly criticise the use of Greenwich Park. In a letter to a national newspaper in June, he wrote: "Staging the Olympic and Paralympic equestrian events in Greenwich Park does not mean 'the destruction of a 300-year-old avenue of ancient oaks' let alone 'the loss of wonderful views over the city'." For more information on NOGOE and Greenwich Park, log on to www.nogoe12.com. For Woolwich Barracks, log on to http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/OlympicShooting/.
‘Unhappy’ residents paint a depressing picture of towns
04 September 2008
A SURVEY has revealed bleak findings - that we are some of the most depressed individuals in the country, writes Liz McMahon.
Research published by the British Household Panel Survey claims Bexley, Dartford and Gravesham, Bromley and Greenwich are among the saddest towns in the UK.
When asked a series of questions including 'Do you think of yourself as a worthless person?', many answered yes.
Bromley came in at a dismal 215, a double blow for the town after being voted London's ugliest borough in a recent poll reported in the Times.
Bexley fared best, coming in at 132, but there was sorry news for Greenwich, which came in the bottom 60 at 225 out of a total 282.
David Sleep, Chairman of the Eltham Society, was alarmed to discover Greenwich's gloomy result.
He said: "I don't know who these people asked but they should have come to me! Greenwich has so much history to offer.
"It is the centre on naval history and the British Empire. It is the gateway to other continents. People sometimes forget its significance.
"It has more open spaces than any other borough in London and an amazingly diverse community.
"It has high standards of public services and transport that will only improve with new Olympic developments."
Dartford and Gravesham hit the middle of the league at number 150.
Experts are divided on what makes people the happiest, citing solutions to a more positive outlook as a good sex life or watching television.
But scientists believe that the longer you stay in a place the happier you get. So hang in there.
Contaminated vodka could cause blindness
28 August 2008
HUNDREDS of bottles of poisoned vodka that could cause blindness have been seized by police.
Counterfeit bottles of Imperial Vodka bearing the SPAR brand name have been found to have excessive levels of methanol in them which, if consumed in large quantities, can cause blindness.
The Food Standards Agency issued a warning after 180 of the bottles were found in a Newcastle flat on August 5 and 70 were reported to be distributed elsewhere, 28 of them in London.
Now Bexley council is urging residents to be vigilant.
A Bexley Council spokesman said: "Excessive levels of methanol have been found in the counterfeit bottles, which would pose a potential health risk if consumed."
Bogus bottles have the smell of acetone, similar to nail varnish and have the code QI:1445c near the base and a smudged inkjet code reading: 102234 04/08/02.
So far, no bottles of the poisoned vodka have been found in SPAR stores.
A spokesman for SPAR said: "SPAR can confirm it has taken the appropriate steps to inform authorities at both the FSA and Trading Standards, and the counterfeit vodka has not affected legitimate supply routes to stores."
Customers should only buy SPAR labelled products from their stores and to be suspicious if they see them sold elsewhere.
This is not the first case of harmful vodka being illegally sold this year.
In February, Glen's Vodka was taken off the market in Hertfordshire and in April, HK Wines of London Road, Thornton Heath was fined £500 for selling bottles of fake vodka.
Anyone with information about the sale of counterfeit SPAR Imperial Vodka should contact the Food Safety Team on 020 8308 7634 or email food.safety@bexley.gov.uk.
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